FF: Breathing Only Half of the Air - Chapter 11

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Chapter 11

The picture of Khushi and Sharman in hospital. Suraj putting the mangalsutra on Khushi. 'Just in time to say goodbye to Mamma.' 'Be a good boy for Papa.'  'Suraj is my husband and this is Sharman. He's our son.' Every scene Arnav had witnessed between the three in the past two weeks flashed through his head in an instant.

'You're lying.'

He managed to catch the words only milliseconds before they left his mouth and found himself closing his eyes in relief that he hadn't actually verbalised his thoughts. He had accused her so many times before and been proven wrong every single time. Accused her of ruining his show on purpose, his car, even his relationship with his sister, but not this time. He opened his eyes slowly to see her still looking at him, with pleading eyes. 'Then why did you leave?'

His voice was calm and controlled but she could see his body shaking slightly in anger just as it had done when she'd told him about her engagement. 'I... I thought I... I thought I had to. You didn't want me and Shy... Shyamji he...'

Her claim that he didn't want her had his mind spinning back to his hurtful words to her in the hospital but the mention of Shyam had him instantly alert again. 'He did what? What did he do to you Khushi?!'

---

'How are you Khushiji?'

She had been walking along the corridor when she answered the phone call but his sickening voice at the other end had her knees buckling.

'Khushiji? Are you angry at me? I know you must be, I couldn't even succeed in getting rid of Rani Sahiba properly so we could be together. I'm sorry.'

'How dare you? How dare you even talk about her after what you did? I'll make sure you're punished for this! Do you hear me?'

'Oh no, Khushiji, did your new lover not tell you? I'm already in jail.'

'Huh... what?' Khushi's mind exalted at the thought of Shyam in jail but the mention of a 'lover' left her confused.

'Did you think I hadn't noticed you and Saale Sahib this past month? Always together, always talking, always laughing? I only let it go because I thought once Rani Sahiba was dead it wouldn't matter; you and I would be together. But then Arnav had me thrown in jail just to keep me away from you.'

She stayed silent as she tried to read the truth in his always sugary sweet voice and understand what had happened. Did this mean that Arnav believed her? But then why did he still refuse to speak to her? Or did he still think she had stayed quiet about Shyam to protect Payal's marriage?

'Are you listening Khushiji? I know this will hurt you and I'm sorry to do this to you but I can't be with you anymore. Now that I know Saale Sahib has had his dirty hands on you, you disgust me. You used to be so pure and innocent but he's ruined you now. Yes, I know all about your overnight stays at the hospital. I can't believe you would do this to me Khushiji! How could you?!'

Her eyebrows furrowed briefly in confusion before she made her decision. If believing that she and Arnav had spent the night together finally freed her of Shyam's lecherous advances she would shout it from the rooftops for the whole world to hear! 'Yes, we did spend the night together! And I would do it again! Because I love him! I never loved you! You make me feel sick! I can't even bear to look at you! I only ever agreed to marry you for my Babuji's sake!' Khushi's hand hovered over the 'end call' button; his accusations and possessive tone making her feel sick.

'Oh yes, your Babuji. Another poor victim. I actually almost regret it now.'

'My... Babuji?' Her voice was so small, fearful of what she was about to hear, what her sharp mind had already guessed in the brief pause between his interludes.

'Yes Khushiji. Your Babuji had figured me out. He knew I was married to Rani Sahiba and he was going to tell you all about it. So I had to put a stop to it. I couldn't let him stand in between us could I?'

Tears fell unrestrained as memories flashed in her head of her Babuji in pain, unable to talk, walk or even feed himself. 'You... you did that to him?'

'Yes Khushiji and do you know why? Because you're MINE! MINE! I will get rid of anyone that stands in our way. Your Babuji, Rani Sahiba and even Saale Sahib!'

'No! Don't! The words left her mouth even before she had thought them. The idea of Arnav in a hospital bed like her father had been, like Anjaliji was now made her heart feel like lead, weighing her down until she slid down the wall of the corridor to sit on the floor, knees hunched up to her chest. 'You can't! You can't do anything to him! Tell me what you want!'

'Finally Khushiji. Finally. It's taken too long but at least you've now realised that you should only care about my needs, my wishes!'

'Just tell me please! Tell me what you want me to do! I'll do anything, just don't hurt anyone else!'

'Leave.'

'What?'

'I want you to leave Arnav! If I can't have you, then he can't either Khushiji! I'll be out on bail within a month and when I am, I want you gone! I can hurt everybody you care about Khushiji, your family, your sister, all of the Raizadas and especially your dear Arnavji of course. When I come out Khushiji, if you haven't left him by then' well let's just say your Babuji and Rani Sahiba were just the trailer, I'll save the full picture for my dear Saale Sahib.'

The images of Arnav in a hospital bed were now replaced by images of him dead and the fear that had gripped her heart made it almost impossible to speak. 'Yes... yes, okay. Yes.'

'There's a good girl Khushiji... well not so good anymore. Not so innocent. Tell me Khushiji, how was he? Did he please you? I would have been so much better...'

She ended the call before he could finish, no longer able to take any more of his slimy voice in her ear. She stood up immediately running to Anjali's room, finally breathing a sigh of relief when she saw Arnav through the door, still sitting by Anjali, still unhurt and still very much alive. No, she couldn't let anything happen to him. She would have to leave him, for his sake, for her family. She couldn't endanger them any more than she had already.

---

He had listened to her talk in silence, his anger at Shyam increasing every second. Jail wasn't enough for that man. He deserved so much worse. 'Why didn't you tell me Khushi? You think I would have let him hurt anyone else? You think I would have let him hurt your family?'

'You... you hated me. You didn't want to see my face. It wouldn't matter to you if I left and everybody would be safe.'

There was no accusation; just quiet statements of fact and they broke his heart. He moved towards her cupping her face gently in his hands and shook his head. 'No, no, I could never hate you Khushi.' He rested his forehead against hers finally mourning what he had lost, what they could have had if he had been able to understand his feelings better, if he had told her just how much she meant to him.

'I looked for you. When Di was in the coma everything was so mixed up, I couldn't separate you and Di in my mind and it scared me. I needed time to think, I wanted to wait until she was awake so I could think clearly but when she woke up you weren't there. All I wanted was to see your face, to see you smile but you weren't there Khushi. You left me.' He tried to keep any accusations out of his voice like she had done but he couldn't. He could no longer hide the pain that he'd been carrying around for three years.

The tiny ball of hope that had been slowly growing in her chest over the past two weeks suddenly seemed to explode and rush through her veins all at once. She put her hands over his on her cheeks and looked up to meet his gaze. 'I'm here now.'