FF: It's Not Right - Chapter 5

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Chapter 5

Arnav looked at Khushi's face; so young, so innocent. He thought about all the things he had said to her, all the times he'd shouted at her and yet still she came back every day with a smile on her face as if it didn't matter at all. Anybody else would have become bitter by now and want nothing to do with him or his family but here she was again wanting to help him, wanting to make his Nani and Di happy.  Thinking about all the times he had mistaken her and all the awful things he had called her made Arnav feel tired as if he had a headache coming on and he closed his eyes slowly and rested his forehead on Khushi's. It just seemed natural.

Khushi held her breath, she didn't understand what was going on. This was nowhere near the scenario she had expected when she came into the room. Arnav shouting at her, making her cry was almost a daily occurrence for her now but this silence, this proximity, his forehead on hers and his warm breath lightly tickling her own lips was so foreign. She didn't move her head, partly out of fear of unintentional contact and if she was honest partly because she didn't want to. So she closed her eyes as well and allowed herself to breathe again normally.

Khushi's breath on Arnav's cheek woke him out of his reverie. There was a heavy ache in his chest that he couldn't identify. It felt painful and constricting and he just wanted it to go away. He sighed, 'Khushi, what do you want from me?'

'I just want to get married,' she whispered back.

Khushi and Arnav's eyes opened at the same time and Arnav pulled his head back a bit so he could look at her properly. 'What?!'

'I...I... I meant I just want you to get married to someone else. Not me. Maybe Lavanya? Or I could find you someone else? But no, not me, never me, I could never...' she broke off her sentence as Arnav was getting a bit too close again.

'Let me be very clear Khushi, I am not getting back with Lavanya, you are not finding me a wife and I am not getting married. Understand?' He finally let go of Khushi's arm and took a couple of steps back hoping to clear his head.  'And what do you mean 'never me'? You really think you could find someone better to marry than Arnav Singh Raizada?'

Khushi couldn't understand what he was trying to say. This whole conversation was confusing her. She wasn't sure what was happening, one minute they were arguing, then they were excruciatingly close and she was practically asking him to marry her! And now what was he trying to say?
'Are you saying you want to marry me?' She asked incredulously.

Arnav seemed almost frozen in place staring at her so she continued, 'oh God no, never. I mean I can't imagine anything worse. Everyday something new, you can never tell what mood you're going to be in. When I expect you to shout because I've done something you stand there smiling stupidly and when I haven't even done anything at all you give me a 10 hour lecture on my status.' Khushi trailed off noticing that Arnav had turned around and was staring at the wall.

Arnav couldn't believe the nerve of this girl. Saying with such confidence that marriage to him would be the worst thing in the world for her. Who did she think she was? She should be so lucky to marry someone like him. Not that he wanted to marry her of course.

So why hadn't he said 'No' automatically when she'd asked? He had wanted to say 'No, of course I would never marry someone like you' but his mouth had refused to cooperate and voice the words.